Most of these are funny, but some of them are just plain ‘ol sad.

Thanks to my friend Sandra Laws for passing these on!

* Objective: Seeking a party-time position with room for advancement

* Professional headline: 1 year old marketing executive

* Achievement: Planned new corporate facility at $3M over budget.

* Explanation of employment gap: career break in 1999 to renovate my horse

* References: Referees available upon request

* Skills: I am a rabid typist

* Strengths: Impersonal skills

* Hobbies: Enjoy cooking Chinese and Italians

* Education: College: August 1880 to May 1984

* Cover letter: I would like to assure you that I am a hardly working person.

And just how much information on a resume is too much?

* Objective: To have my skills and ethics challenged on a regular basis

* Personal Information: Married, eight children, prefer frequent travel

* Language Skills: Exposure to German for two years-but many words are inappropriate for business

* Reason for leaving last job: the owner gave new meaning to the word paranoia

* Achievements: Nominated for prom queen

* Education: Finished eighth in a class of ten

* Interests: Gossiping

* Awards: National record for eating 45 eggs in two minutes

* References: Bill, Tom, Eric – but I don’t know their phone numbers

* Salary: The higher the better

* Cover letter: Please disregard the attached resume; it’s totally outdated